I decided to write a bit more about the personality traits - I keep writing about the NEO PI-R inventory and the research using it. So my plan is to write about all thirty facets and five big traits that this inventory reports.
Fourth trait - Agreeableness, fourth facet - Compliance.
The dark side of the Compliance is, of course, letting other people climb all over your head (Lithuanian proverb says "all goats climb on the bending tree"). Compliant person has difficult time setting the boundaries and maintaining them, easily succumbs to the influence of other people and feels empty and unfulfilled on the inside because of that. The light side of compliance is reflected in capability to avoid unnecessary conflicts and arguments. Continuing with the proverbs - "do not stand across the path of a fool". By the way, following the same rule Japanese samurai avoid fighting weaker warriors who were insisting on the fight. In real life most important skill is, of course, being able to choose when to stand your ground and when to give up. When looking at your score you will have a chance to re-think whether your boundaries are healthy, or perhaps you need to work on loosening or strengthening them.
Low score in NEO PI-R Compliance shows that you may be more aggressive, like to compete more than cooperate, and can express your anger when needed. High score shows that you may tend to yield in interpersonal conflicts, to suppress the anger and tend to rather forgive and forget. You probably are complaisant and tender minded.
My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach. Book my counselling session here: https://fb.com/book/saukstasproto/ ||| Become Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/saukstasproto
Photo: tiburi on Pixabay
#spoonfulofreason #psychology #neopir #agreeableness #compliance
No comments yet
Be the first to comment
MORE INSIGHTS YOU MIGHT LIKELearn more by discovering other insights
Podcast I would like to recommend - "Infinite Monkey Cage". While it covers a very wide range of topics, today I enjoyed "Science of Dreaming", and there is more on human mind and psychology related subjects. It is difficult to discuss such a subjective field with so much reliance on memory and personal interpretation, but these guys do it brilliantly. Podcast hosts - Brian Cox and Robin Ince with a panel of cool guests for each episode.
Episode on dreaming: https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m0008wtj
My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach.proto
#spoonfulofreason #psychology #recommendations #podcast #infinitemonkeycage
Book that I would like to recommend this week is in Lithuanian, Danutė Gailienė "Ką jie mums padarė". I am not sure if an English version exists, but it definitely should. It is not only about the psychology of the personal trauma, but also about what happens to the whole nation during wars, repressions and exile. Not only what happens in general, but also what did happen to our parents and grandparents and what does it mean to us and our children. A difficult read, excellent writing style and an important piece of knowledge.
My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach. Book my talk to know more.
#spoonfulofreason #psychology #recommendation #book
Do you like our own pictures? No?... This is why. And how to change it.
People often dislike their own photo, because they believe they look better (this is called "self-enhancement bias"). Even those who claim that they do not like their own look, have an internal "pretty me" which is "in reality" or which "should be" - and get disappointed when it magically does not materialize.
Another reason - we usually like what we see often (this is called "mere exposure effect"). Even though we see ourselves quite often, it also often happens _in the mirror_, and the subtle difference of reverse picture is sufficient to not identify it with yourself as you see in the picture.
What to do:
🧠 use exposure effect for your benefit - makes selfies often and look at them (no need to publish :); shot glance will be more productive to generate the effect than long staring. Keep in mind that selfies will increase sense that you are attractive to yourself, and not to others.
🧠 smile. During smiling perception of attractiveness also increases, even if the face has objectively unattractive features.
🧠 perceived attractiveness is related to perceived happiness - which makes it worthwhile cultivating you own small happy moments (and taking pictures of them... :)
🧠 look at the old pictures - this advice is not scientific, but comes from author's own experience. But I see the logic here, as man of us tend to romanticise the past
My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach.
Bornstein, R. (1989). Exposure and affect: Overview and meta-analysis of research, 1968–1987. Psychological Bulletin, 106(2), 265–289. doi:10.1037/0033-2909.106.2.265
Diener, E., Wolsic, B., & Fujita, F. (1995). Physical attractiveness and subjective well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 69(1), 120.
Epley, N., & Whitchurch, E. (2008). Mirror, mirror on the wall: Enhancement in self-recognition. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 34(9), 1159-1170.
#spoonfulofreason #psychology #photographs #attractiveness
Photo: Milada Vigerova from Pixabay