Monika Kuzminskaitė on PsychologyHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating mattersSome time ago
Today I am learning things in the seminar "Cognitive behavior Therapy for Couples". The teacher is awesomely beautiful haircut free for about a year :) For that occasion, a research that I already shared. Why do relationships break apart? Partners not satisfied? Well, yes, but... Success in relationship depends on how we asses the risk in the relationship, how we assess the tension between need to protect ourselves and and need to develop relationship. Happy relationships happen only when risks are accepted. Need to develop relationship is wish to be together, to open up, to be related, to be part of, to share. When you state that this wish is weak - or that risk of opening up is big - then relationship is at risk of breaking apart. And here it is very important to mark the difference: the perceived benefit, warmth of the relationship is little. It is not the harm and hurt in the relationship that makes it weak. It is not that it IS bad - it is that it is NOT good. I would like to remind you the standard "what did I do wrong?". Nothing. But that is not the core of the good relationship. The core is what is good, what makes you happy. If there is no happiness - ten relationship has nothing to hold on to, research says. And the fact that you do not hit your partner or that you are faithful to him/her is not a good enough reason to make your relationship working. What do you do to make him/her happy? What does he/she do to make you happy? Article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/202008/what-really-breaks-couples-apart Photo: Pexels from Pixabay My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach. #spoonfulofreason #psychology #coouple #relationship #happiness
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Monika Kuzminskaitė on PsychologyHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating mattersSome time ago
Meta-analysis. What is the trait most important for the happy relationships? Wealth, health, patience? No, no and no. This meta-analysis (in this case, summarized results from 174 various research papers) states that the most important trait is psychological flexibility. Having this important yet underrated trait means that people even in very stressful situation can: - remain open and accept both good and bad from life - stay present - gently accept difficult, complex feelings and let them go - see a wider context of issues in question - live according to the core values - stay resilient while pursuing important life goals The happiness in relationships improves because people are able to live in the moment and in cohesion, are better at parenting and at resolving conflicts and are better able to take care of their children well-being. Psychological flexibility may be improved by mindful attention to the events in your life, cognitive therapy practices (such as Socratic questioning) and meditation. Research: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2212144720301952 Photo: Hari Mohan from Pixabay My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach. #spoonfulofreason #research #happiness #psychologicalflexibility

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Lina LinkeviciuteLuxury Business and Sales Professional/Theatre Director/Timeless Paintings
Absolutely interesting stuff !!! Would like to know more about psychological flexibility !
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Monika Kuzminskaitė on PsychologyHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating mattersSome time ago
Words can hurt, maybe even more than fists. Does that happen to you? Do people keep things from you on purpose, do not share their thoughts and feelings, dismiss and counter your memories, blame you for the things you cannot control, calling you names or using hurtful labels? Well, that is verbal psychological abuse, a common component of romantic relationships, friendships and parent-child relationships. None ever deserves to be treated like that, and such behavior should always be objected. First instinct is to always argue with the abuser and to prove him or her wrong. And that would be the right instinct if it was a rational conversation, which is never that with an abuser. An effective strategy is to ignore the content of any hurtful phrase and calmly call out the abuser. Do not get into argument. If this calm statement does not work - leave the situation, limit the encounters with the abuser, or consider ending the relationship (which might be difficult, if you depend on the abuser - but still worth considering). Article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-mysteries-love/201612/the-best-way-end-verbal-abuse Photo: Ulrike Mai from Pixabay My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach. #spoonfulofreason #psychology #verbalabuse #psychologicalabuse
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Monika Kuzminskaitė on PsychologyHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating mattersSome time ago
Documentary I would like to recommend: "Heal" (available on Netflix). I will start with the statement that I am always quite careful with non-scientific methods as well as paranormal things, and value most of them as interesting from cultural perspective and not something to rely on. Nevertheless, most of this documentary is about the biopsychosocial model, about how mind and body are related, how it is important to not give up and use every measure in order to achieve good and balanced health for every one. https://www.netflix.com/lt/title/80220013 #spoonfulofreason #psychology #health #whattowatch

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Miu BashoEngineer student, lab technician pharmaceutical industry
At times likes these, I believe this is a good recommendation to watch. Thank you!
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