Monika Kuzminskaitė on PsychologyHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating mattersSome time ago
How to argue with your partner? - Acknowledge that the other side has good intentions as well. Aloud. As in "I know you mean well", and without the irony - Avoid blaming ("you always do that...") - Speak about yourself - I feel, I think, I can't - do not guess other person's feelings, thoughts or intentions - Own your behavior - understand that what you do may be a part or contribute to the disagreement - Accept that other person may be defensive in the arguments (which is very normal), try to tolerate it (meaning observe without attempting to change it) - Speak about solutions; if the solution depends on the behavior of other person - ask, request, discuss, but do not demand. It is difficult to argue... but possible! As your abilities to argue will grow and improve, your arguments will turn into very short and productive "work meetings"

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Andrew Lim Mao TungWindows System Admin with a passion to motivate and likes Technology.
For me, I just give in, and adapt to my partner requests. Too old to argue, increase Stress, and not resolve anything.
7 months ago
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Monika KuzminskaitėHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating matters
Sometimes it is also a good strategy - grass bends in the wind and comes back up after wind calms.
7 months ago
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Eleonora OrCreator, deep thinker, artist
Thank you! Needed this yesterday 😁
7 months ago
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Monika KuzminskaitėHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating matters
Eleonora, hope it still helps.. :)
7 months ago
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Jorick SietsemaMental health
Needed this now thnx, had a conversation with a friend I told him he is absolutely right but that there is more to it. I understand his side but he didn't find anything I say valid cause he did not even wanna belief. He needed to see documents in front of his eyes and I also gave one wrong explanation about a thing.He took that to the extreme to say and make it so I didn't understand anything and it became a closed conversation where he wasn't open to change his beliefs. So the saying that grass bends in the wind and comes back up helped alot.
7 months ago
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Andrew Lim Mao TungWindows System Admin with a passion to motivate and likes Technology.
If you write number 9 on the floor, and 2 person is standing at the top, another at the bottom, 1 will see 6, onther sees 9, both are right, but argue, it is 6 and 9.
7 months ago
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Andrew Lim Mao TungWindows System Admin with a passion to motivate and likes Technology.
7 months ago
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Monika KuzminskaitėHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating matters
Jorick, glad it helped. Hopefully you can get it resolved eventually.
7 months ago
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Jorick SietsemaMental health
Haha one of my friends left me (probably for minimal of half a year) and the other one doesn't wanna talk about world matters anymore. But this just means there is room for other people, still gotta let these emotions of losing friends flow don't wanna hold then up and lose feelings 👍🏻
7 months ago
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Benedetta MarchiorelloViolin player
What I do think is that I thought that arguing is a more dinamic situation that brings to a solution, I always thought that great, I do have my idea and you have your idea. My idea will change a bit as a result of a conversation as yours and we will be patient enough when the other idea doesn’t fully match yours. The great idea would however be a overmatching sometimes of both the ideas to discuss together and to develop starting from a common starting point. This never happened.
6 months ago
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Monika Kuzminskaitė on PsychologyHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating matters2 days ago
More/again about the robots and psychology. As we know, robots need to be made to have some human like features to make their job easier. It actually is a real problem - if humans are awkward about the robots, then robots cannot help people as well as they could, or people do not trust robots with the tasks at all. So, this is an area of research now. If robot is assessed to be high on agreeableness, emotional stability and conscientiousness (!), then people are more likely to have a positive outlook towards it. The longer people interact with the robot, the more they are likely to like it - even if they were regarded as weird looking in the beginning. My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach. Research: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0747563221000789 Photo: ergoneon from Pixabay #spoonfulofreason #psychology #robots
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Monika Kuzminskaitė on PsychologyHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating mattersSome time ago
Meta-analysis. What is the trait most important for the happy relationships? Wealth, health, patience? No, no and no. This meta-analysis (in this case, summarized results from 174 various research papers) states that the most important trait is psychological flexibility. Having this important yet underrated trait means that people even in very stressful situation can: - remain open and accept both good and bad from life - stay present - gently accept difficult, complex feelings and let them go - see a wider context of issues in question - live according to the core values - stay resilient while pursuing important life goals The happiness in relationships improves because people are able to live in the moment and in cohesion, are better at parenting and at resolving conflicts and are better able to take care of their children well-being. Psychological flexibility may be improved by mindful attention to the events in your life, cognitive therapy practices (such as Socratic questioning) and meditation. Research: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2212144720301952 Photo: Hari Mohan from Pixabay My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach. #spoonfulofreason #research #happiness #psychologicalflexibility

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Lina LinkeviciuteLuxury Business and Sales Professional/Theatre Director/Timeless Paintings
Absolutely interesting stuff !!! Would like to know more about psychological flexibility !
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Monika Kuzminskaitė on PsychologyHealth psychologist, with special love for food and eating mattersSome time ago
Words can hurt, maybe even more than fists. Does that happen to you? Do people keep things from you on purpose, do not share their thoughts and feelings, dismiss and counter your memories, blame you for the things you cannot control, calling you names or using hurtful labels? Well, that is verbal psychological abuse, a common component of romantic relationships, friendships and parent-child relationships. None ever deserves to be treated like that, and such behavior should always be objected. First instinct is to always argue with the abuser and to prove him or her wrong. And that would be the right instinct if it was a rational conversation, which is never that with an abuser. An effective strategy is to ignore the content of any hurtful phrase and calmly call out the abuser. Do not get into argument. If this calm statement does not work - leave the situation, limit the encounters with the abuser, or consider ending the relationship (which might be difficult, if you depend on the abuser - but still worth considering). Article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-mysteries-love/201612/the-best-way-end-verbal-abuse Photo: Ulrike Mai from Pixabay My name is Monika, I am psychologist. I help to deal with daily and difficult questions about behavior, thinking, emotions. I write, counsel and teach. #spoonfulofreason #psychology #verbalabuse #psychologicalabuse
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