Antanas Bernatonis asked:
"I would love to ask if you could come back in your 20s, what would you do on everyday basis? Where would you invest your time and what would be the main advice you could give to yourself?"
I will start with my belief that every human being has a unique story of life, a unique path of how they got to where they are today. It is quite rare that the advice of a person to themselves apply to somebody else. Thus, don't take my answers for granted. They will probably not be useful pieces of advice for you or anyone else because of everyone's unique situation.
I would suggest to ask the right questions to yourself and figure out the answers by yourself in a way that makes the most sense to you, as you have the most in-depth knowledge of yourself. And I suggest starting with the question 'What kind of life you want to have?'.
Getting back to Antanas' questions, I can say that I feel quite happy where I am today. Thus I wouldn't change anything that I was doing in my 20s. And what was I doing? In my early 20s, I was coding 12-16 hours per day, it was my passion, I loved the process of building software and its impact on people. I mastered my professional skills. However, I wasn't mastering my soft skills, everything human-related. I was so bad at them that I even wasn't aware they exist. The phrase "emotional intelligence" was just a random buzzword to me. In my late 20s, I was running a company with 100+ people. My professional skills were irrelevant in that position. Soft skills were those which were needed the most. However, I had them completely undeveloped. Therefore my advice to myself would be "figure out what the heck is emotional intelligence and master it as good as you code".
N.B. This is an experimental insight. What is the experiment? Instead of broadcasting insights based on what you think is interesting, broadcast them based on what people want to learn from you. Do you think it is a good idea? Let me know in the comments. Also, if you like to ask me more questions, do that from my profile. If you like the experiment and want to be asked, let us know!
Photo below: my dog in dunes:)
Hey Justas, as you have founded different businesses I was wondering what was the toughest challenge you ever faced during your entrepreneurial journey ?
Have a nice day :)
Asked by Mathieu Hecquet
Good question. I was thinking about it for a few days. I ended up that the toughest challenges were usually related to my beliefs, fears, history, attitude, and way of thinking, which helped me in the past. Yet, as time passed and contexts changed, some of these things expired and started to harm me. It is very tough and challenging to operate on an outdated framework of a mind. It is difficult to spot harming old beliefs. It is painful to let go of them, especially when they worked well for a long time. And it takes time to rebuild new beliefs.
In essence, my toughest challenges were always internal and rarely external.
What is the purpose of debate? Most of us, if asked, would say it’s about helping someone with an incorrect, harmful idea see the light. It’s an act of kindness. It’s about getting to the truth.
But the way we tend to engage in debate contradicts our supposed intentions.
Much of the time, we’re really debating because we want to prove we’re right and our opponent is wrong. Our interest is not in getting to the truth. We don’t even consider the possibility that our opponent might be correct or that we could learn something from them.
As decades of psychological research indicate, our brains are always out to save energy, and part of that is that we prefer not to change our minds about anything. It’s much easier to cling to our existing beliefs through whatever means possible and ignore anything that challenges them. Bad arguments enable us to engage in what looks like a debate but doesn’t pose any risk of forcing us to question what we stand for.
It’s never fun to admit we’re wrong about anything or to have to change our minds. But it is essential if we want to get smarter and see the world as it is, not as we want it to be. Any time we engage in debate, we need to be honest about our intentions. What are we trying to achieve? Are we open to changing our minds? Are we listening to our opponent? Only when we’re out to have a balanced discussion with the possibility of changing our minds can a debate be productive,avoiding the use of logical fallacies.
Bad arguments are harmful to everyone involved in a debate. They don’t get us anywhere because we’re not tackling an opponent’s actual viewpoint. This means we have no hope of convincing them. Worse, this sort of underhand tactic is likely to make an opponent feel frustrated and annoyed by the deliberate misrepresentation of their beliefs.
And if you’re a chronic constructor of bad arguments, as many of us are, it leads people to avoid challenging you or starting discussions. Which means you don’t get to learn from them or have your views questioned. In formal situations, using bad arguments makes it look like you don’t really have a strong point in the first place.
Read more about bad arguments and how to avoid them: https://fs.blog/2020/05/bad-arguments/